I think we can all agree 2020 was hard. The year seemed to end on a somewhat desolate note for me, too: I watched friends and family struggle financially due to job losses, and people’s health was compromised due to the virus. I also noticed a rise of strife and tension in my own home! My marriage felt distant and torn; my teenagers were struggling with their identity; and I even noticed that my little ones, who for most of the pandemic had carefree lives, were affected.
Completely depleted, I found comfort in the Psalms.
I turned there because I felt torn between what I know God’s perfect plan to be and the conditions I seemed to be stuck in. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was robbing me of peace either. But with help from King David, I was able to give words to my soul and find why I was “so cast down” and my heart so heavy. As the Psalmist so rightly describes, “Even the best of years are filled with struggle and sorrow” (Psalm 90:10).
Allowing space for grief is a healthy way to process any kind of loss, but especially the isolation of 2020. I found myself desperately calling out to God: “How long, Lord…how long?” (Psalms 90:13). Sweet relief came as I poured my heart out and wept, and two things became very clear to me.
First, God’s love is the only thing that can truly satisfy our soul and secure our future. It is not a one-and-done thing. It’s a daily surrender as a form of worship that can fill our “parched and weary land” (Psalm 143:6). Only his “ever-present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1) can carry us through the hardships of everyday life, whatever those might be.
“Satisfy us in the morning with your faithful love, so that we may shout with joy and be glad all our days” (Psalm 90:14).
Praying and meditating on God’s Word became very helpful in putting things into perspective for me. It’s God’s love that fills every torn, rugged place of our being. It’s a beautiful exchange.
Secondly, I realized that God is fully aware and in control of what is happening in our lives — in the past, present, and future. Psalm 90:1-2 says, “Lord, you have been our refuge in every generation. Before the mountains were born, before you gave birth to the earth and the world, from eternity to eternity, You are GOD.” God’s got us! And even though we may not know what 2021 is going to bring, we can trust the character of the One who is allowing it to come.
I therefore pray we all would make it our goal to discover how deep, how wide and how vast God’s love is for us (Ephesians 3:18). I believe knowing this would make us live life from a whole new perspective. We’d parent our children and treat our spouses differently. We might even be able to sit and enjoy our families and the world around us differently, even when things feel in disarray, because we know we are beautifully loved by God.
So let us all find refuge in the Lord and comfort in his Word. I hope we can surrender our control and striving and rest in his glorious love. May we stretch our hands and open our hearts before him. If he loved us enough to save us from eternal death and sorrow, surely he will be willing to help us in our daily struggles.
Therefore, always remember the battle belongs to the Lord.
Journal / Reflection Questions
- How often do you slow down enough to notice you’ve grown weary and tired? Would you consider making space to rest with God today? What would need to change about your day in order to make that happen?
- Challenge yourself daily to find at least three ways God is showing you how much he loves you.
- Pray Scripture over yourself and your loved ones.
- Consider praying this prayer out loud over yourself right now:
Because I am lovingly devoted to God, he will deliver me.
He will protect me because he knows my name.
When I call out to him, he will answer.
He will be with me in trouble.
He will rescue me and give me honor.
He will satisfy me with a long life and show me my salvation.
Kasha Jankowski is a mom to two bigs and two littles and is originally from Poland and speaks three languages! She enjoys cultural diversity, food and music, and is even more passionate about loving God and loving people.